Column Says Water Guns Are Dangerous For Children
“It doesn’t matter if it’s a water pistol or a semi-automatic rifle…because a firearm isn’t a laughing matter,” the author actually wrote. mfg photo

What’s one of the biggest threats facing our children today? Would you believe, it’s water guns? If you buy into this post on from Lauren Levy titled “Why Kids Should Never Play With Water Guns. Period.”, then that’s the idea precisely.

Levy writes that she didn’t have many “non-negotiable” rules in her house growing up, but one of them was “no water guns allowed.”

“We still had all of the same Summer fun, but with water squirters that didn’t look like deadly weapons and never trivialized this important topic. We didn’t make childhood memories with an object inspired by something that kills kids daily,” she writes, clearly trying to make readers feel guilty for any summer-day memories of time in the backyard spent blasting friends with squirt guns and tossing water balloons like grenades.

Not surprisingly, Levy admits she did not have a gun in her home growing up, but thinks that banning water guns is something of even more import to gun owners.

“Even if they’re colorful and super cool, kids shouldn’t be playing with water guns because it normalizes the real thing. Kids need to learn that guns aren’t toys. There’s nothing fun or playful about this serious topic and it doesn’t matter if it’s a water pistol or a semi-automatic rifle — a firearm isn’t a laughing matter,” because clearly children cannot be relied upon to comprehend or be taught the difference between a toy that squirts water and an actual firearm.


“If a child becomes familiar and comfortable playing toy gun, what’s going to stop their inquisitive hand from reaching out for the real thing if it ever crosses his or her path?”

We’re just gonna leave this right here:

It should also be pointed out that Levy references no data, statistics, or scientific studies that show playing with toy guns or at war games as a child leads to aggression or violence as a teen or adult. Probably because there isn’t any. Her arguments seem to be based entirely on her feelings, and the particular way her parents chose to raise her, and nothing more.

Levy goes on to demonize water guns, saying that they only serve to create a false idea that real guns are “harmless.”

“Popular water guns also make light of a very serious situation. There are some children who will never smile again — all because someone picked up a gun. At the same time, we have little ones playing and laughing over the very thing that is killing other kids. It just isn’t right.”

Extending Levy’s logic means society should get rid of anything that isn’t a firearm yet is shaped like one—even if the reason for the shape is that it’s a pretty convenient shape for the human hand to use—because we wouldn’t want children confusing regular objects with firearms…like power drills, or glue guns, or barcode scanners.

The Colgate student who was carrying the device had been working on a project for an art class.

Art Student with Glue Gun Triggers University Lockdown

You can read one of Levy’s other missives about why kids shouldn’t be allowed to open up their presents during their own birthday party here.